Last November after finding myself in a rut I broke down and got life coach and by rut I mean serious crisis. I was working three jobs, living paycheck to paycheck, my car had not been registered for two years and I was on government assistance. I truly could not in any way shape or form see a way out of this tragedy I called life. I was crying in the kitchen strolling through Facebook watching all my friends and their fabulous lives when I came across an ad for a Life Coach. I opted in to her four part video and realized I needed help. I made my decisions based on not disappointing other people. I did not put myself first and I was not doing what I was put on this earth to do. I spent my life helping people and their businesses for free. I continued to work at a job that took advantage of me and I my skill set. I received poor compensation because I did not value myself or my abilities which led me to work multiple jobs and keep a victim mentality. I functioned in a lacking mindset instead of an abundant mindset.
I quickly began working on myself and decided two things. The first was to go into business for myself and the second was to bite the bullet and get a life coach. The first decision was easy. I am f@#kin’ awesome and I could not think of a better coworker than myself. The second decision was even easier because if I could do it myself I would already be successful. I have read many books and gone through many programs. I have become a stronger more confident person and have started a successful business helping others find success in their own life and business. All the training and coaching can be exhausting at times, but I continue to grow as a person and I believe that personal and professional development is the key to success. Though all this work I found that one thing stands out. It is as if something does not serve a purpose in your life you need to remove it from your life.
So in my everyday life I have one question that helps me make all decisions both in life and business. Do I really give a f@#k? Asking this question will change your life. It may sound harsh, but in reality so many of our decisions are based on other people. Allowing other people’s thoughts and opinions of us affect our decisions prevent us from being our truly amazing and authentic self. I swear this will be one of the most freeing exercises you will ever do. So when someone asks you to go to a dinner party ask yourself, do I give a f@#k?
Can you watch my child?
Can you stay overtime at work?
Can you take a shift at work?
By asking this simple question you will be able to really become your true authentic and unapologetic self. I am not suggesting by any means that you flip off the world. I am suggesting that you listen to that little voice inside your head that is truly looking out for you. The quiet voice that comes from your gut and is really in tuned with your best interest. There are so many variations to this question so feel free to use whichever one suits the current problem:
Does it f@#king matter?
Is this f@#ing useful?
Would this f@#cking person do the same for me?
I think you get my point. Be harsh. Get real with yourself and what is best for you in your life. Give yourself a wake up call every time you make a choice until you put yourself first. So the next time you are faced with a dilemma in your life simply ask yourself “do I give a f^&k?”